Due to the fact that our authors are on holiday we will be closing down for the summer. But don’t worry we will be back on the 1st September with a whole host of new articles for you. We have already started writing in preparation for next term so hang on… Here is how long you have to wait…
We will be back in 4 days, 12 hours, 50 minutes, 37 seconds
As you may have noticed, the All Nighter staff have gone a couple of days without updating. This is due to a problem at one of our data centreswhich was caused by Serbian Militia breaking in and attempting to steal one of our servers. Fortunately they were stopped by Royal Marine Commandos and nothing of value was taken.
Seriously though, we have just been a bit lazy lately and four of us have all started full time work to pay for our summer escapades. Don’t worry though! Normal service will be resumed in the next couple of days!
The All Nighter Team
One potential problem about maintaining a humour website is writing content that not only appeals to our masses of fans but keeps us from doing any productive work. The good thing about having Google Analytics attached to our site is that it generates content for us! Let the good times roll:
This week I will be looking at some of the best search terms used to find our site and what articles the magical internets found for those lucky enough to be able to use a search engine:
Notice the incorrect spelling of Assassins? This clever web surfer used this technique to effectively eliminate all references to the popular computer game: Assassin’s Creed.
This very widely used term was used to find our website this week. However one thing confuses me, we are not even on the top ten pages of results. This person either REALLY wanted britney porn, or really wanted to find our site but could not remember the URL.
Now I am not one for University snobbery but when a higher education student cannot spell fail properly then I am entitled to point out that this is why they are at UWIC and not Cardiff. (Editors Note: Unless they did want to fall into an exam at UWIC and their degree scheme involves some kind of superhero training)
This one really knocked the wind out of my sails. I can only guess that somebody has a horse that is used for some kind of farming work and is baffled at the fact it is spending a lot of time lying down. I think a more appropriate search term would be: “Vets +Horse +insert town name”
This one really is a gem. I have come to the conclusion that the person searching for this had one of two reasons for doing so:
1. They were unsure how to react when their other half performed fellatio on them and wanted to know how it was supposed to feel.
2. They were scared that it was going to hurt when their creepy uncle does it. It’s ok, he hasn’t been the same since the accident. The doctors assured you he is fine, he is no longer a danger to society.
That school had a faulty fuse box…
See, isn’t self generating content fun? Next week’s edition should provide another exciting insight into the minds of the internetting public.
As regular readers will be aware, the site has only been up a week. However we are already getting some interesting traffic from our close friends as Google. Somebody found our site using the following search query:
“How to achieve the Jack Penate look”
Interesting… I hope my guide to success in the British music business helped them on their way. Although I would like to believe that the person who Googled that is having some serious problems in their life if they are searching for a guide on how to look like that stupid bastard.