The World According To Jamie (When Drunk)
By Jamie • May 19th, 2008 • Category: ArticlesNow talk to most of my friends and all would have to agree I do have a habit of spouting off a lot of random crap when sober. When drunk however, another world opens up and my paranoid state of mind at the world around me is laid bare for all to see.
Note: The following theories about the world do not reside in my sober memory and so I am relying on quotes that other people have told me I have said in order to form my drunken world view.
Ants
Now, for whatever reason ( I think it has to do with Phase IV) I have the up most respect for ants when I have had a few drinks. Some memorable quotes that come to mind are
- “Ants Are Only Here To Make Sure People Don’t Screw Up”
- “In 200 years humans won’t exist , there will just be ants what do you expect?”
Chips
Another thing about my drunk self is my inability to grasp the concept of chips. I can only explain this one through quotes:
- “Christian chips are the most fickle chips of them all”
- In response to the question: So you are cooking humans in the oven and they turn into chips? I answered: “Basically”
- “Washing, Food..It’s all the same really”
Morality and Life after Death
“You realise that the world doesn’t give a shit about good and bad, its how you behave after death” - Jamie, 2007
Jamie Is Awesome. Enough said really. If there was a prize for the most awesome person in the universe...ok it probably wouldn't go to him, Neal Patrick Harris and Hugh Laurie would beat him hands down but Jamie would come in a close 67th.
After a tabloid scandal involving a heavy night of drinking, a church and a teacup he was confined to the darkness of the computer lab where he spent many a day and night perfecting his coding ability.
His amazing ability to code like no man before or after him led to the invention of not only this website but several other pointless sites.
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