On behalf of the All Nighter Team I once again apologise for the lack of updates to the site. I am currently in Valencia learning that Spain is a much better place than the UK in almost every respect. Nice.

I don´t know what excuses the rest of the team have but I´m sure they are good. This is the only update I will get round to doing so it´s a bit of a shit it´s an apology..

Wait a second, Why am I apologising? Get off your arses and do some exercise. (Hard to do when it´s 35oC… Hot.)

Adios

For many years students have been socialising with their friends. They have been drinking, staying up all night and generally making complete arses of themselves. In most cases this works fine but sometimes a situation arises that creates a dispute that cannot be resolved by normal means.

The Bro Code is a well documented set of rules that apply to guys around the world. However some of the points in this sacred document do not always apply to situations a lot of students find themselves in.

Because of this, I have had some thoughts about a code of conduct that will apply to all students regardless of sex or race. A code of conduct that will create a utopia for all students..

The code of conduct will be split into sections depending on the situation it applies to. It can and will be added to when appropriate.

Section 1 - Organising an Event:

- An Event constitutes the following:

- A party
- A Night out
- Any sports related activity
- Any other event where by more than two people will be invited

Article #1:

The organisers of an event will endeavor to invite every person within their social circle.
(This can be achieved by assigning a house or group of people to each of the organisers.)

Article #2:

For a night out, the destination is a democratic process where by the majority vote wins.
Clause 1:
The destination should always take into account the financial situation of EVERY person attending.
Clause 2:
If a majority vote does not exist, the initial organisers will make the final decision on the destination while still complying with Clause 1.
Clause 3:
If one of the attending persons is celebrating their birthday then they shall have the final say in destination.

Article #3:

For a party, the organisers have the final say on the following aspects of the event:
- Theme
- Guest restrictions (Can override Article #1 if genuine reasons exist)
- Music restrictions

Section 2 - Pre-Drinking:

Pre-Drinking constitutes the time before a night out that involves the attending people drinking to save money .

Article #1:

The hosts of the pre-drinking event can make a decision with regards to any games/sub-events that can aid the process of pre-drinking.

Article #2:

Any people attending the pre-drinking event who are not included in a particular sub-event (E.g. Drinking Fifa) can take part in another event of their choosing.
Clause 1: The host of the pre-drinking event has the right to refuse alternative event suggestions.

Section 3 - Parties

A party is an event that is often held within the organiser’s house and involves alcoholic beverages, music and general merriment. Note: A party and a gathering are not the same thing.

-A gathering usually involves less people, quieter music and guests are expected to bring all of their own provisions. A gathering can also include film or TV watching.
- A party has more people attending, louder music and the hosts are expected to supply some of the alcoholic beverages. TV or film watching is generally inapparopriate for a party.

Article #1:

The party organiser has the right to refuse entry to any guest who arrives at the party. Approved party guests are expected to help the organiser if the refusal causes a dispute.

Article #2:

The musical playlist at the party has to be approved by the hosts. Any changes to the playlist have to be approved by the hosts. Unauthorised changes to the playlist by any party guest is automatically deemed as “uncool” and the guest will have to allow the host to undo any changes that have been made.

Article #3:

All guests at a party should respect the host’s property and should not proceed to trash any part of the house.

Article #4:

At least one drinking game should be played at all parties and gatherings. The choice of game is down to democratic vote but all guests should include themselves in at least one drinking game.

Next Week: Sections on going out and group politics will be added.

Any other suggestions or additions to the Code of Conduct are of course appreciated.

Good Afternoon fellow internet surfers. This weeks Search Engine Weekly Roundup promises much but delivers nothing but a bitter taste that most would associate with a Polio vaccine.

• “Incest” (Editor’s Note: WTF!) Found: Sex and the Bible

Only one kind of internet pioneer searches for this in Google: The bad kind. That shit is fucked up.

• “UWIC exam results” Found: Tag: UWIC

I don’t know why you would search for exam results at UWIC. Do they even have exams? I thought grades were calculated on how many pairs of flip flops and how much sports equipment you own.

• “what to tell your mum when your doing an all nighter” Found: Our home page

Awww diddums, does mummy worry if you stay awake for a whole night? Most of our articles (bar this one) are written in the early hours of the morning. Read the articles bitch.

Next week we will be delving into the underbelly of long lost search engines such as: Goggle, Ghettosearch and spywareville.

So I take it your a student. In which case you should have probably pulled an all nighter at least once in your life. If not then you should definitely start. Why? There are a number of reasons:

1. It’s pretty awesome
2. See number 1.

So now you want to pull an all nighter you’re thinking to yourself “Geez, how can I stay up all them hours?” Well my friend I, as the current record holder amongst the all nighter team for continuous awake hours, shall teach you.

Terminology

• All Nighter - The act of staying up for more than the normal 24 hour awake-sleep cycle. It can also refer to the act of staying up during the period from sun down to sun rise although it is generally acepted this is not a proper all nighter.
• Allnightee - A person undertaking the act of an All Nighter
• EHS Zone - The Early Hour Sleep Zone, between 3am and 6am, during these times due to lack of natual light, prolonged deprivation and general stress your body is more likely to crave sleep

Things to Avoid

• Bed - Believe it or not more people fall asleep on their beds everyday than any other piece of furniture. Take care to avoid.
• Lying Down - Again it’s amazing how many people fall asleep lying down these days. In order to stay awake you need to keep moving. Purchasing one of those chairs with wheels is a great way to encourage movement. If money is short swing backwards and forwards on a standard chair can be used to mimic moving.
• Heavy Food - Heavy or Greasy food can kill an all nighter in its tracks, being full makes you lazy and being lazy leads to sleep.
• Home - If you can help it being out and about prevents you from falling asleep. The instinctual fear of being unprotected will prevent you from falling asleep. Get out into a 24 hour computer lab and soak in the artificial lighting.

• Work - Work is boring and so may cause you to fall asleep unwittingly. Now the fact you are pulling an all nighter means you have some work to do so it is important to space out the work as much as possible throughout the night. I recommend James’s famous quad-10 strategy which involves 20 minutes of solid work followed by 20 minutes of complaining about the work to a fellow allnightee(Me) and then 20 minutes of a non work related activity. This provides you with the three of the five chemicals needed for an all nighter:
  • Workadone - Provided by the 20 minutes of Work
  • MetaWorkadone - Provided by the 20 minutes of Complaining - Simulates Workadone
  • Happydone - Provided by the other 20 minutes of non work. Makes you feel like the all nighter is worth the effort.

Things To Not Avoid

• Caffeine - Drink this stuff in quantities that would make a horse shit hippos. Caffiene is the fourth needed chemical for the all nighter.
• Chocolate - Chocolate has long been proven to stimulate the happy zone in your brain and is linked to serotonin increases which happens to be the fifth chemical brain thingy needed for an all nighter.
• People - People are essential in the production of metaworkadone in the brain (see things to avoid: work). They can also be a source of entertainment, help and motivation needed to get you through the EHS Zone.
• Alcohol - Well not just alcohol, alcohol has a very unique property when consumed in small amounts and combined with sleep deprivation - it acts as a stimulus and keeps you awake especially around other people. Warning: If you cross over the Alcohol to Caffeine ratio you will end up sleeping. Also high amounts of caffeine and alcohol consumption have been related to dickheadedness and Sensless Speech Syndrome (Jamie et al 2008)

At The End

So you made it to 5am. You are coming out of the EHS Zone and approaching sunrise, at this point it is acceptable to take a long break and to go and view the sun rise, this will stimulate your body into thinking you just got up early and will hopefully inspire you to complete another day.

My advice at this point is to:

• Go Home
• Take a Shower
• Get Dressed in New Clothes
• Have a Light Breakfast
• Get on with your Day

With the above technique (and ignoring all the avoid me rules) I stayed up for 42 hours, completed a 20 page report and wrote the best bulk of a Media Player. I then went out with my friend for an awesome end of term night out where I drank more than my fair share of alcohol. At the end of it (3:30am) I felt great and was up 8am the next morning and back in Uni to give my demonstration and hand in my report.